My desire to be a mum was strong from when I was quite young. When my nephew was born, it grew stronger. When my 2 nieces came along – it was confirmed. I was hooked and I would definitely be a mum. It was just a matter of when.
My path in life and my career as a hypnotherapist and coach even led me to teach empowering pregnancy & birth education to expectant parents (which I love!) and I just assumed that when the time was right (oh if only I had known) – that I would set about ‘making it happen’.
Why wouldn’t it? I am a person, you see – that has often taken risks in life and just DECIDED something was going to happen and it usually did. (These days I am learning to embrace my ‘inner control-freak’ but back then, I was tested to my limits)
6 months passed, I became worried. Then after 12 months, feeling totally lost and out of control. By 18 months of battling infertility I was an utter mess. But I put on my best ‘game face’ for the outside world. Inside I felt empty.
Of that I am certain.
The heartbreak and repeated fertility treatment failures that followed at times almost became too much to bear. Nothing could have prepared me for the gut-wrenching disappointment that came with each new blow. Trying to conceive nearly broke my spirit entirely. I lost touch with the fun-loving & bubbly person I used to be. Both happy and sad things happened around me throughout that period – but there was only one way it seemed I was capable of feeling: Numb.
But something deep inside inspired me to fight. Something had to change.
Here I was – an experienced hypnotherapist & coach with so many skills at my disposal – so I decided to use them. Properly. I also did an enormous amount of research into how I could prepare myself physically & emotionally for a new cycle. With my husband’s encouragement, I decided also to ask for some guidance and support, which was the beginning of a whole new experience. I reconnected with myself and my inner strengths and I was encouraged to tap back into skills I had used in my years of hypnotherapy practice with my clients which had resulted in many pregnancies – which had begun to lay dormant in me (due to depleted hope).
And everything changed.
I want to share with you what I learned about the absolute necessity of developing a positive mindset through infertility. How I developed resilience, acceptance, courage and learned to enjoy my life & my relationships again (even before I became pregnant). How I managed to achieve my dream of becoming a mother after a long and difficult road of fertility treatment and how I can help you to step closer to your dream too.